Defining Your Emotions...

There are several reasons we could have a difficult time understanding our emotions. Even if we can access them readily, what are we supposed to do with them. Some people avoid them or are distant and disconnected from them. Others are emotionally reactive, unable to sort out their own, and giving too much credibility to them.

If we could access our emotions, and become aware of our own internal experiences, we can begin to avoid REACTING in and EMOTIONALLY CHARGED way, and learn to RESPOND in an EMOTIONALLY INFORMED way.

Here are some things to know about emotions:

1. We are meant to feel the full range of our emotions.

2. We don’t have to be afraid of our emotions.

3. Our emotions are always valid, theyre just not always accurate.

4. Emotions are just signals that our brain senda to us, like alarms, to alert us to

something we should be paying attention to.

In their book “Why Emotions Matter”, Tristen and Jon Collins give a really helpful concise way to view and determine our emotions. By labeling the emotion, it allows us to then sort out what that emotion is (or at least typically is) signaling to us.

Here is a list of the basic emotions we feel, and what those emotions may be signaling to us.

Anger: A signal that my expectations weren’t met

Sadness: A signal that I have a wound that needs to heal

Fear: A signal that I’m in danger

Shame: A signal that my identity is being threatened

Guilt: A signal that I did something wrong

Jealousy: A signal that I have an unmet desire

Happiness: A signal that a desire has been met

When we explore our emotions like this, we can become curious observers of our emotions, rather then judgemental of them, or confused by them.